Any excuse is better than none

I have prepared no essay or memoir today. The reason will be apparent after you hear my story of our activities this morning. To that end I will present a little drama.

Scene one:

Husband, sitting in front of wall heater in family room, speaks .
“Look at this! I’m going to have to take this thing apart. It’s full of hair and dirt!”
Wife looks but does not reply.
Husband: “I told you this heater was a piece of s---t. Look how the screws are set into the inner frame. There’s not one set in straight.”
Wife looks but does not reply.
Husband dismantles the heater, which is indeed full of cat hairs and dust. In taking out the screws husband drops one which falls down behind the wall paneling and cannot be retrieved.
Husband: “Go out to the tool room and find one that matches the others. Be sure it will fit.”
Wife goes but does not reply.
Wife returns,
Husband, looking at the screw: “ You brought a wood screw. These are metal screws. See if you can find a metal one. Make sure it fits.”
Wife goes back out and returns with screw that will fit.

Scene two:
Husband : “Well, I got it cleaned out. Let’s put the @#%#@ thing together again.”
Husband tries to fit the heating element into the wall bracket, has trouble and drops it onto the floor.
Husband: “How much did we pay for this heater anyway?”
Wife: “Four hundred dollars.”
Husband: “ We got gypped. It’s not worth it. Who did we buy it from anyway?”
Wife: “I’ll have to look it up. Do you need to know now?”
Husband: “Of course I don’t need to know now. “
Wife: “Then why did you ask?”

And so it went for another hour or so. We finally got the thing back together, and that is why I have nothing written for today's blog.